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Interview questions I never get asked

1 March 2015  /  Writing  /  Whimsy

Written in Auckland, New Zealand.
Birthday musings in the sunshine.

There are the interview questions that actually get asked, then there are the ones you wish they would ask...

Problem Solve: how do you store iPhone headphones so they don’t tangle?

Take cable, fold in half. Repeat. Do not wind or coil. Store the resulting bunch without twisting.

Biggest Regret?

Never landing a kick flip.

Who shot first, but more critically why is that important at all?

Han. It’s critical to establishing that Han is a rogue and quite willing to back up his talk with action, he’s not just a fast talking sleazeball.

Guilty pleasure song?

Icona Pop - I Love It. Cathartically anthemic.

If you had the power to greenlight a movie, what sequel would you put into production.

A Galaxy Quest sequel. Because perfect, must have moar.

If you could have any car from any movie, which one would it be?

I’m not a car person, but the chrome Lotus Evora in the movie The Host.

Marvel or DC and why?

Marvel. Because single universe, more upbeat stories, more quirkiness, more Guardians of the Galaxy. But mostly, because the characters are relatable and human. They’re damaged, not broken.

Favourite sweet?

Jellybeans. But only the ones by Pascal, all the other brands get it wrong and make it taste like marzipan (which is to say, gross). I love all the colors except white, those taste like the trash bins I throw them in.

First piece of design that stunned you?

Second generation, 6GB iPod mini. Extruded, brushed aluminium shell with a blue backlit mono screen. Tactile and somehow utterly satisfying wheel driven interface that made you feel always in direct control.

I not only still own mine, but it works perfectly and is in daily use driving the kids sound system.

Please provide a brief justification for the ontological necessity of modern man’s existential dilemma.

The people who affect the most change in the world are the ones who are dissatisfied enough with the status quo to question whether the current ways should continue to be.

Their dissatisfaction is most often driven from grapling with the existential dilemma of life, meaning, and purpose.

Without the change driven by the dissatisfied, society would stagnate and eventually collapse.

Thus modern man’s existential dilema is necessary.

Q.E.D.